Right on the Edge of Crazy

For the first time in my life, I feel I’m truly going batty.  I’m not usually one to complain, or at least I try not to and instead face the world with a smile.  And I’m not very patient in my brain when someone tells me how busy they are and then lists the things they’ve been doing to prove to me how busy they have been.  Though I realize I’m guilty of this on occasion I’m sure, and I'm about to tell you how very busy I am.  But this time, the busy is for real and I’m barely keeping my head on straight.

Last time I posted, it was Samuel’s birthday, March 2^nd.  On the same day, not only did we celebrate his 5^th birthday, but we acquired a new house not for ourselves, but for Peter’s mother to retire into from Connecticut.  It is a small 2 bedroom 1 bathroom house that we purchased and she will rent back from us…and it was a serious fixer upper.  For the past several months Peter has spent every weekend and nearly every evening after work at Elaine’s house repairing and updating the house.  I’m not just talking about a coat of paint here and there.  At one point or another over the last several months he has raised the floor with a new support beam, put up new sheetrock and counters in the kitchen, textured every room in the house, painted every room in the house, gutted the bathroom down to all but the tub, sanded all the hardwood floors, refinished all the hardwood floors, trimmed the overgrown yard, added new windows, and ran new electricity and plumbing.  We had amazing help from my father, many firefighters, and good friends who helped with a lot of childcare so we could make it at least livable.  There is so much more to do…but we have time now.

On June 13^th, Peter flew to Connecticut to meet up with his mom and drive her to her new home with his best friend, Ken.  In the last two and a half weeks we have finally moved Elaine west, had Peter’s best buddies from his youth visit for a week (Ken and Amanda – which turned out to be probably the best company we have ever had!), our nephew from North Carolina stay with us for five days, and Peter’s brother and family stay with Elaine but spend much of their time with us at our home.  We wrapped this incredibly intense time up with a 66^th birthday party for Elaine, a family reunion at my parent’s for the McAmis family, and much firefighting for Peter in this dry climate.  Is that all you say?  We just got our van back with a $700 repair to the fan motor, our septic system is failing probably due to tree roots requiring me to do laundry for six people anywhere but here, and we are having problems with our well (thank goodness we share one with the county well driller).  We are exhausted, some of us sick with a summer cold, and right on the edge of crazy.

Why you say?  Here is the kicker for the edge of our sanity.  Nina and Jocelyn turn 2 next month and boy are they two in a way Samuel and Ethan never were.  Our parenting skills are facing a whole new challenge and half the time I just want to sit with my head in my hands.  First of all, they are trying to potty train themselves.  They simply don’t like their diapers and won’t wear them.  I have cleaned up poopy mess four times from Jocelyn and once from Nina.  I can’t tell you how many times they have peed on our floor.

Tonight was pure madness with the diaper situation, and it started when Nina took her diaper off and told me she was going to go potty.  Trying to be encouraging I said, “Woohee!  Okay!” and sent her off to the toilet.  I picked up her clothes to go to the hamper and when I passed the bathroom it was now both girls in the bathroom not going potty but emptying all the toilet paper into the bowl.  “No!  No toilet paper!”  I took the roll away and stupid me, who got distracted by the phone, left them with a brand new box of Kleenex on the back of the toilet.  When I returned to the bathroom they had emptied much of the Kleenex all over the floor and into the toilet.  I removed the tissue, pulled Jocelyn aside to go dress her but when I got her into the hall Nina started grabbing paper as fast as she could out of the garbage can and started stuffing it into the toilet.  I shrieked, “No!  Yucky!”  and she stopped.  I had to put down Jocelyn and pick up Nina to wash her hands.  Then Jocelyn started digging the soggy, wet paper out of the toilet!  “No!  No!  No!” I shrieked.  I sat down Nina in the hall who proceeded to scream “Potty!  Potty!” and run against my legs and grabbed Jocelyn.  I shook the nasty paper out her hands while giving Nina the leg and butt block to prevent her from getting back to the toilet.  Finally both girls had clean hands, so I set them in the hallway by grabbing one of their arms and dragging them out there.  Then I ran into the bathroom, shut and locked the door and finished cleaning up the sopping wet paper, wiping down walls, flushing the toilet, and emptying the trash.  Awesome.  There still weren’t diapers on these girls….so…Nina proceeded to poop on the dining room.  Mind you, they speak well enough now that when I walked out and hollered, “Oh! Who pooped on the floor?!!”  They answered in unison “Nina did it!” but it sounded more like “NINAH dit it!”  I cleaned up the poop as both of them continued by peeing on the floor.  So Nina and Jocelyn kicked mom’s butt with mucho wet paper products, nasty hands, one pile of poo and two puddles of pee.  How does this happen you wonder?  Have you seen how fast they move?  And did I tell you they are the bossiest Rossis we’ve had yet?

You must also watch out for the Rossi Twin Block.  They gang up on people.  I’m completely serious.  And it doesn’t matter the age or gender of whomever they decide to form their twin block against.  We were in the Raggedy Ann and Andy House at Storybook Island, a building no bigger than four feet by five feet which requires dedicated ducking by adults to enter.  This little girl, maybe four or five enters the house and Nina puts up her hand, palm flat in this girls face and says “NO!”  Jocelyn then makes her stance next to Nina and copies Nina’s actions.  I explain to them that we have to share the house and let other people in and they say, “No – mines!” Both are incredibly emphatic and pushy when they form the twin block.  Unbelievable!  This wasn’t the first time this had happened.  They had done it in a sandbox at a park with my mom caring for them and then recently we were at a birthday party where they performed their super-twin stunt.  At this party, there were kiddie pools in the yard for everyone to share.  Nina and Jocelyn were playing in one when a five year old girl came up to the pool and tried to get in the water.  I could almost hear Nina and Jocelyn chant, “Twin Block!  Unite!”  Then Nina proceeded to say “No” again with the, “speak to the hand” action, followed by a good shove landing this little girl down on her butt.  I felt awful.  Yep…I’m that mom.  I have two daughters who are beating their way through this world.  They’ll slug you, then smile and say, “shorry….shorry.”

They are annihilating my house one room at a time, they move faster than Lighting McQueen, they scream forever when you put them in their car seats, Jocelyn is throwing food and dishes like crazy, Nina lies face-down on the floor and throws a classic tantrum when she doesn’t get her way, they form the most amazing and infuriating twin block, and they won’t stay dressed.  They are approaching two without a doubt.  At the end of every day, I feel beat to a pulp.  I’m so tired, I’ve left my wallet in the Safeway shopping cart and drove all the way to Hulett without noticing until I needed fuel, sent my boys to my parents’ house when they should have been at a birthday party for a good friend instead, forgot to take my kids to swimming lessons one night, and neglected to take a milk cup out of my van to the point that it smelled like an animal died in it for days.   I’m tired.  Truly.  There I said it, I complained.  Oh, and did I mention how busy we are in addition to dealing with the twin, nearly two-year-olds?  We are so headed for crazy.